These are record breaking hospital visits weeks.
Mental health more, then physical.
You'll never know how severely you can break apart till you do.
You thought I was in a piece.
You thought.
Maybe because homo sapient have this super natural force linking their souls into one.
Legion is it, they call.
So can you feel my agony?


I tried to let go, put everything down.
Maybe because I relied on my own strength, I didn't succeed.
But sometimes it's just so difficult you know.
So I pray, I cry, I realise Your grace.
I bawl and I fall sick, due to over exhaustion, dehydration.
And despite all my anguish, I still cling on, ever so tightly. Like a fool. Unwise fool.
I pray you God, use force to take this away.

I want to be wise. I want to be strong. I want to possess compassion. I want to give unconditional love.
I want because I'm not. And because being like this is arduous.
I can't do this on my own.
I know I've received immense grace. But I don't reciprocate.
Why is it I don't contain that basic human nature,
to respond to overflowing mercy, favour.

He gives and takes away.
You see the irony.
Is this the moulding process?
Because it's really painful.
And in the process I fell apart like soft sand to the tide.

But every poison has it's antidote.
With all my heart I thank my dearest friend for being there the past few days.
Or I might have died, of exhaustion maybe, or heartbreak.




Back to physics.
Physics has once again top the Joanne's best subjects chart.
1. Physics
2. Chem
3. Math
And you may ask omg what happened to your math.
I don't know, really. I wonder.
I neglected chem.
Weird how I neglect things.